is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
