Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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