Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
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