maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
