So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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