I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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