C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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