my phone cant type all the emotion im having
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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