Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
