We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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