Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I'm like, not good at living.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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