I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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