Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
