I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Randomize
