New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Randomize
