was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Are my feet made of real feet?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
