11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Randomize