you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
