Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
