i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
