some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
