I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize
