can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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