I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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