I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
