I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
