Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
