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• (714): View more from California

  i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day

  (619): View more from California

  ahah at least you got away with it

  (714): View more from California

  nope...my gran was the one who informed me

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?

  (773): View more from Illinois

  it's more of a rinse.

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Better looking than her though please.

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• 

  27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood

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• (980): View more from North Carolina

  My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.

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• (478): View more from Georgia

  Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."

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• 

  These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to

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• (817): View more from Texas

  If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.

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• (858): View more from California

  I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste

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