I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
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