I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I need a hoe opinion
go on
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
