I think I just saw someone hide a body.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
