K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
