WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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