That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
