my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
