I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Randomize
