he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
All I want is dick and wine.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
