I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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