I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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