Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
