My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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