East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I want to be your penis for a week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
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