All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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