why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
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So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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