Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
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