Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans

(1-610): View more from Pennsylvania

who is canola oil?

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

you're an idiot.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(610): can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans (1-610): who is canola oil? (610): you're an idiot. http://tfl.nu/vy3c

Replies (64) Good night (2957) Bad night (729)
Favorite
(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(724): I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass. http://tfl.nu/otet

Replies (35) Good night (781) Bad night (7965) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(407): View more from Florida

at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(407): at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions http://tfl.nu/ea5m

Replies (20) Good night (4596) Bad night (764) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(206): View more from Washington

My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.

(415): View more from California

Why?

(206): View more from Washington

Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(206): My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now. (415): Why? (206): Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch. http://tfl.nu/7w51

Replies (15) Good night (1589) Bad night (4162)
Favorite
(631): View more from New York

Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(631): Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate. http://tfl.nu/qonz

Replies (5) Good night (1085) Bad night (2555) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(336): View more from North Carolina

They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(336): They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays. http://tfl.nu/wrv2

Replies (13) Good night (7555) Bad night (1031) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(850): View more from Florida

There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(850): There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here http://tfl.nu/c3ng

Replies (14) Good night (2230) Bad night (735) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(904): View more from Florida

I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(904): I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day http://tfl.nu/k829

Replies (6) Good night (2084) Bad night (577) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(239): View more from Florida

We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(239): We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk http://tfl.nu/ub56

Replies (3) Good night (1811) Bad night (627) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(734): View more from Michigan

i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(734): i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen http://tfl.nu/gv17

Replies (12) Good night (1476) Bad night (582) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(843): View more from South Carolina

you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(843): you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time http://tfl.nu/xd6c

Replies (7) Good night (1881) Bad night (497)
Favorite
(218): View more from Minnesota

I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(218): I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent. http://tfl.nu/0vft

Replies (25) Good night (2252) Bad night (634)
Favorite
(817): View more from Texas

And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(817): And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword http://tfl.nu/z2rx

Replies (1) Good night (475) Bad night (768) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(870): View more from Arkansas

Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(870): Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants. http://tfl.nu/u5r1

Replies (1) Good night (421) Bad night (199) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(407): View more from Florida

I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(407): I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter. http://tfl.nu/mj4q

Replies (2) Good night (527) Bad night (225) Order T-Shirt

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: