Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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