would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
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i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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