I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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