billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
