I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
